Although Fr. Pelphrey has some very positive and inspirational thoughts on the Christian practice of forgiveness, I will have to take issue with him on one point in particular: the disinherited offspring. I feel that to imply that every Christian is required to forgive his debtors UNCONDITIONALLY, refusing to even consider any sort of restitution is both a simplistic reduction of the Christian message and unrealistic in any practical application in today's society.
I'm sorry if my words seem a bit too caustic.
Perhaps if I give an example, Fr. Pelphrey could see another side to this problem.
I know someone who was terribly mistreated (physical violence) as a child and adolescent by both siblings and his father, who, by the way, drank a lot. This person attended school in a Roman Catholic institution and was sexually molested and harassed at the age of 13 by a Roman Catholic priest. Out of shame, he did not reveal what was going on at the school immediately to his parents. He finally experienced several nervous breakdowns. His parents, both devout Catholics, never brought suit against the parish, though it ended up costing the person in question all of his savings for hospitalization. His parents always helped out his other brothers when they needed help buying a car or paying for their studies, but they somehow never had the funds to help him out. This person was required to continue living at home because he had lost all confidence in himself. Finally, he was able to scrape enough to move out into a cheap appartment. He returned home one Sunday at the invitation of his mother. The father had been drinking and the visit turned into a nightmare when the father walked in front of blacksheep's car as it was driving off. The father always blamed this person for trying to kill him
Years later, his older brother went to study for the priesthood in Italy and his studies were funded by the father. The older brother wrote syrupy letters asking for forgiveness, which the person in question granted, inviting the older brother to visit with him and his wife. And the other brothers came and visited this person also, taking full advantage of his and his wife's hospitality. And then the father lost his mother and decided he was getting on in years, and so he gave full power of attorney to one of the younger brothers of this person. This younger brother, in accordance with the wishes of the father, and with the implicit approval of the other brothers, proceeded to disinherit this person. Fortunately, this person went and got a lawyer and was able to salvage something. I'm sorry, I just won't buy into the so-called Christian teaching that, in order to be a good Christian, one must permit this sort of abuse from ANYONE, especially from members of one's own family. Jesus said "turn the other cheek", but He never said what we had to do after that. Hopefully, Fr. Brendan Pelphrey will understand that forgiveness is a problematic issue.

Dear Paul,

Thank you for your posting. Unfortunately we are all very busy this week as this is Holy Week in our Orthodox Christian faith worldwide. We will forward your comments to Fr. Brendan to see if he wishes to respond to your post. We always welcome comments from our listeners.

Have a blessed Pascha.

Fr. Chris

We must forgive all sins against us, as Christ did on the Cross. It is ascesis, a struggle to come up with that forgiveness. Twenty three years ago I was kidnapped, and tortured. It took me twenty years to learn to forgive these people. All sins, brutal non-brutal, rape, horrible things. Forgive the sinner, you just don't have to be their best friend. One can't pick and choose from the Holy Scriptures. It is precisely because it is so difficult to forgive that we must do it, not for those who have sinned against us, but for us, so we don't carry that weight in our hearts.
gerasimos+

It took my dad's wisdom to help me navigate my bitterness & hate to guide me through forgiveness of my attackers. It was more poignant on my 21st Birthday when dad sat me down & proceeded to remind me of all the offenses I held him responsible for(meaning I blamed him for lack of protection as a parent). His statement was as follows: "Theodosia! you are now at the age of accountability. This means for the rest of your life anything that happens Good or Bad you have caused on your own person, because up until today I took that responsibility for you. Now is a good time for you to decide how life will be for you. I'm here to listen and guide, but ultimately life is in your hands."
My attackers & offenders went on to live their lives and I seemed to have done more harm carrying in my mind "the offense" and left myself unforgiving for my need to "hold onto their sin against me which then became my sin of unforgiven"

i am episcopalean and i love the beauty of your holy eaucnarist thank you for broadcasting it on the internet. jm